Realizations 01

From when we can barely walk to when we retire, we all have role models. Some people are obsessed with their role model; dressing like them, behaving like them, dreaming like them. Others subtly admire someone. They like how they are, and somedays they wish they could be like them. In your eyes, your role model is perfect. Well, at least that's what I thought until recently.

I've been thinking back through all the role models I've chosen. First impressions are important, because they stick with a person. More often than not, first impressions are the choosing factor for whether or not someone will like you. With all of my role models, they made a brilliant first impression, causing instant admiration.

My first role model was my mom. She was perfect. She could cook, clean, sew, buy what ever she wanted, go where ever she wanted. She was smart. She was an assertive free spirit. A modern hippie. And I loved that.

Throughout my entire life, I have always loved how my brother was. He was athletic, smart, popular in his own quiet way, and freakin hilarious if you ask me. I tried in every way to be like him. Even if it meant stealing his socks. Which I did.

Teachers are always influential. We've all had that brilliant teacher, that truly made us think, made us want to learn. Those teachers had stuck with me over the years, and I still make reference to them.

Friends. You know that friend of your's that is good looking, or smart, or athletic that you just wish for the love of gawd you could be like. We all have that friend. And we all wish, at some point, that we could be like them. Have their clothes, their look, their wit, their talent.

So I've been thinking about all these role models...and thought, wait a minute, if you have the perfect role model, why do you switch after a period of time?

Because you change. They change. No one is perfect. And we realize that after we've spent time with the one we admire.

My mom. She yelled at me. She freaked out sometimes. She made mistakes. She was suddenly not a good role model for me. So I moved on. Eric. He was suddenly making stupid choices. Fighting all the time. He suddenly wasn't so cool in my eyes. Friends. We all get in at least one fight with a friend. An exchange of foul words that truly hurt, and suddenly their beauty doesn't matter. Nor do their smarts, their talents, their dreams. They're not perfect. No one is.

After all this, we sit there stumped. Every role model we've tried to have has been some sort of lowlife, screwup, or idiot. We love these people for their wonderful traits that we would love to pick up. But we fear that we'll pick up their bad traits as well...so what do we do?

Consider this. Instead of picking one person and trying to be like them in every way, pick out their positive characteristics. Say, they make it their goal to compliment at least one person everyday, or they are always optimistic. You learn from their positive habits. And don't limit this to just your role models, do this with everyone you meet. You'd be surprised to see the difference it makes...

I know I am.